How we can talk with our kids about bodies, consent and trust

Trigger warning: This post touches on sensitive but important topics, including child abuse prevention, sexual assault awareness, and how we can begin talking with young children about their bodies and consent. If you're not in the headspace to read about this today, that’s okay. Take your time. Support resources are included at the end, and I’m always here if you want to talk more.

There’s no gentle way to say it friends: throughout April, we observed both Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month, as well as Child Abuse Prevention Month.

Despite many of us feeling disheartened and upset that we need to highlight these causes on a national scale, they’re important, and I’m grateful that many resources, advocates, and organizations provide crucial education and activism on these fronts.

Furthermore, even if your child is not especially at-risk, EVERY child can benefit from their parent’s purposeful consideration of how to talk to them about their bodies, and how to approach the topic of consent in their homes and with family and friends. It is normal to find these considerations uncomfortable and unwieldy. All children, though, have a physical body, and it is within the context of their understanding that body (we call this body literacy), that we as parents can lay the foundation of safety and ownership.

I have many resources on this topic and am happy to provide more information if you’d like to explore more: just ask.

For starters, though, I want to offer my favorite book for young children on the topic of bodies. I’ve got a copy at ECFE that I’d be happy to let you take a look at, or, consider taking some time at a bookstore or library to find one that feels most aligned with your values and comfort level.

Second, if you have 16 minutes to enjoy a TED talk, I recommend this one, given by a real expert in the field. She gives many practical suggestions about how to engage in conversations with children that introduce them to bodily autonomy, consent, and understanding in ways that are age-appropriate, responsible, and even fun.

Writing this felt heavy, and reading it may have, too. If you’re still with me all the way at the end of this, thanks for hangin’ in there. If you or someone you know wants to learn more about child sexual abuse, or needs help, please look at this page from RAINN; there’s hotline information at the bottom.